Archive for October, 2009
Wednesday, October 28th, 2009
It was Monday, which in itself is not a good thing. I got up in a pretty pissy mood because of issues over the weekend; step-parenting leaves a lot to be desired, but that would be another post altogether.
Anyway, our son, Scott called me this morning. He is a very bright, intelligent and caring person. He’s in his last semester at FSU (Florida State University) from which he’ll be graduating with a degree in Biological Science. He’s been working in a lab for the past six months and had finally come to the conclusion that he wants to go into Neuro Science. I felt that this was a wonderful thing because it seems like it would be a interesting and satisfying field to go into. More importantly than that, Scott finally felt that he had some direction. He had been in limbo for a while which had become increasingly frustrating and stressful to him. I was glad that he seemed to have found his calling.
Well, this morning he called me which he often does, usually just to say hello. To my surprise and out of the blue, he just informed me that he is very strongly considering joining the Peace Corp! After my heart skipped a beat, we conversed. He’s not really ready to commit to grad school, he’s feeling like he needs a break from the “academic” world and he really wants to dedicate at least some time to helping people that are less fortunate than him. Now as a mother I’m as proud as I can be of him and his unselfishness. Also, as a mother my worries start about his safety and missing him but I assure him that what ever his decision, I’m behind him 150%. Of course, and understandably his only real hesitation is leaving his girlfriend, Liz. Will their relationship be able to withstand a 27 month separation? I told him that if it is strong enough it will.
As soon as we hung up the phone, I did what any mother would do, I went into the Peace Corp web site to find out as much information that I could.
The Peace Corp is an amazing organization that provides assistance 139 countries. As a volunteer there are a wide variety of areas that they might contribute such as education, health and agriculture.
Volunteers are provided with a living allowance that enables them to live in a manner similar to the local people in their community. The Peace Corps also provides complete medical and dental care and covers the cost of transportation to and from your country of service.
Peace Corp volunteers are committed to 27 months. They are entitled to a two day vacation per month and can utilize this however they wish. Some choose to visit other areas that are also in need, some have their family members visit and some volunteers take those two days to visit home.
After the volunteer serves their 27 months and return home they are provided with around $6000 to use as they like. It’s something to get their feet back on the ground whether they choose to use it for education, housing or other needs.
After reading as much as I could to educate myself as to what Scott’s new endeavor might entail I felt better. It would be a wonderful and educational experience that he would proudly carry with him through his life. I anxiously await his decision.
Posted in A Day In My Life | No Comments »
Monday, October 26th, 2009
This email is too good not too share. This is one solution that we should all adhere to.
“A physics teacher in high school, once told the students that while one grasshopper on the railroad tracks wouldn’t slow a train very much, a billion of them would . With that thought in mind, read the following………….obviously written by a good American.
(I think this lady’s on the right track. Let’s all get behind her!)
Good idea. . .. .one light bulb at a time. .. .
Check this out. I was in Lowes the other day, and just for the heck of it I was looking at the hose attachments.. They were all made in China . The next day I was in Ace Hardware, and just for the heck of it I checked the hose attachments there. They were made in USA ..
Got me thinking. Start looking.
In our current economic situation, every little thing we buy, or do, affects someone else – maybe even their job.
My grandson likes Hershey’s candy. I just noticed that it is marked ‘made in Mexico ‘ now.. I choose not to buy it any more.
My favorite toothpaste, Colgate, is also ‘made in Mexico ‘ now. I’ve switched to Crest. You have to read the labels on everything.
This past weekend I was at Kroger. (Can be true for any store.) I needed 60W light bulbs, and Bounce dryer sheets. I was in the light bulb aisle, and right next to the GE brand I normally buy, was an off brand labeled, “Everyday Value.” I picked up both types of bulbs and compared the stats – they were the same, except for the price. The GE bulbs were more money than the Everyday Value brand……….but the thing that surprised me the most, was the fact that GE was ‘made in MEXICO’ and the Everyday Value brand was ‘made
in (you got it) the USA’, in a company in Cleveland, Ohio.
So throw out the myth that you cannot find the products you use every day……made right here!!!!!!!
On I went to another aisle. Those Bounce Dryer Sheets I needed – yep, you guessed it! Bounce cost more money – and – it’s made in Canada . The Everyday Value brand was less money – and – ‘MADE IN THE USA ‘! Bye-bye Bounce! I did laundry yesterday, and the dryer sheets performed just like the Bounce Free I’ve been using for years………..and at almost half the price!
My challenge to you is this. Start reading the labels when you shop for everyday things, and see what you can find that is made in the USA . The job you save may be your own, or your neighbors!
If you accept the challenge, pass this on to others in your address book, so we can all start buying American……one light bulb at a time!
Stop buying from overseas companies and other countries!
(We should have awakened a decade ago . . .. . . . )
Let’s get with the program . . . . and help our fellow Americans keep their jobs, and create even more jobs, right here in the U. S.A.”
Posted in Your Economic Solutions | No Comments »
Friday, October 23rd, 2009
I just read this article today “For Some Parents, Shouting Is the New Spanking” that was posted on NY Times.com and tweeted by PierrePaperon. Personally I find it very sad that parents actually feel restricted in how they can discipline their children. Unless there is a parallel universe that I don’t know about, the controversy about spanking children has created even more problem children. Are the people that are claiming that spanking is detrimental not seeing what the rest of us see? Has anyone met their children? The article states that yelling is the new spanking, in my opinion they work in unison. My assumption is that if parents are made to feel that spanking is a bad thing they will refrain from it, but who is to be the judge, history or what “doctors” say? Am I the only one that sees a negative change in today’s generation? The people who will refrain from hitting their children are not the ones who had caused the controversy. Who doesn’t understand that the people that abuse their children by hitting them and using physical force are not “Normal” and they will continue to do it anyway. I suppose there might be a fine line.
I can tell you this, I spent many a day with my mother’s five finger mark on my arm. I can not tell you what any of the circumstances were, but I can tell you this; whatever lesson was to be learned, I learned it quickly. AND, I survived. I knew well the taste of Ivory Soap, which is why on one occasion my sister and ran into the bathroom to rub Dove Soap against our teeth instead. You can rest assured that whatever we had said, we did not repeat, (at least not in mom’s presence). AND, we survived. Mom was a tough disciplinarian. We didn’t get everything we wanted, we learned the word “NO” very early on, and accepted it and we learned that if we didn’t give our elders respect we were in a heap of trouble. AND ya know what, we survived. I have three siblings, normal as normal can be. We are not aggressive, angry or abusive people. We are all well adjusted, respectful, nice people with compassionate and caring hearts. Hmmm and we were hit!
I am the biological mom of two boys and step-mom to three girls and a boy. Of course, boys will be boys and my boys sometimes got out of hand. Sometimes they were irate. Sometimes they were at each other. Reasoning with a child that is being a child is not always the easiest thing to do because at times they are so out of the loop that they are beyond being talked to. I always found that the best way to awaken their senses was to give them a quick smack. I didn’t beat them, it wasn’t a continuous barrage of hitting, but when I smacked them, boy did I get their attention. That is when I would follow up with yelling. For the most part my yelling ultimately would send them to their respective rooms until we all calmed down. The critical aspect of all of this was that when we did calm down, either they or I would approach the other to discuss our confrontation. Communication is key! AND, never did we part without both apologizing and saying, “I love you.”
To clarify the apology, I tell you this. When either of us was wrong, we apologized for being wrong, but most of all I always apologized for my reaction and explained that it was out of frustration and that it never meant I didn’t love them.
For the record my boys are not aggressive, angry or abusive people. They are both well adjusted, respectful, nice people with compassionate and caring hearts. I often get compliments on what wonderful people they are and what a good job I did as a mother. Now at 25 and 22 years old, they are my best friends.
Parents today seem to think that they need to be friends with their children. I can tell you from experience that you need to be a parent first, friends comes later. My husband, a non-disciplinarian, will be the first to tell you that he made many mistakes. He wishes now that he had been a stronger parent and that he stood up to his children. He also wishes now that he actually spanked his children who have had a major array of problems through out the years, and still do. He always believed that he should stand down. he never wanted to piss them off, he wanted them to like him….he’s sorry now.
I truly believe that spanking and yelling at a child is not the issue. The issue actually is in the communication before, during and after.
Children need discipline and parents are responsible for teaching them. Unfortunately, because of the economic chaos in this country, people are stressing and both parents are working at least one job each. It is also unfortunate that because of these circumstances many parents are too stressed or tired to do what it necessary when their child needs to be disciplined. It’s a lot easier to say, “yes” than “no.” It’s a lot easier to let children get away with things because parents are too distracted by “life” as it is. The problem is not “spanking” vs “yelling.” The problem is that parents need to understand that children don’t come with a set directions, no one can tell you what’s right in bringing up your child. The most wonderful children come from parents who think with their heart.
Posted in This is What I Think | No Comments »
Wednesday, October 21st, 2009
Talk about a chain of events that snowballs. Three days ago my 13yr old niece, Tifanie was at her brother’s soccer game. As 13 year old girls go, she had her eye on one of her brother’s friends and they began texting each other. The whole team went to Subway after the game. Tifanie’s brother, Colby sat with the boy she had been texting.
As it turns out Tifanie wasn’t feeling that well and wasn’t in school the next day. She had gone to bed with a slight fever, but woke with a temperature of 103. My sister, Donna thought it best to take her to the doctor as a precautionary measure because Tifanie has asthma. As my sister stated ,”the doctor listened to her breathing, checked her throat and ears. Same old stuff and then diagnosed her with “SWINE”. There were no blood tests and was no laboratory work done.” The doctor recommended Tamiflu and sent her on her way. The next day Tifanie was without fever, had her appetite back and was fine, more than likely a 24 hour bug.
The chain of events:
Tifanie contacted the boy when she missed school and she told him that the doctor said she had Swine Flu.
The boy told his mother who panicked because he had been sitting with Colby, (a possible carrier)
The mother, a nurse, sent the coach a very long, panicky email expressing her concern and giving advice on how to handle the situation.
The coach sent an email to all team members advising them that they were recently exposed to someone that tested positive for swine flu and included the mother’s email.
The coach put off practice for a few days.
Donna thought it best to explain to the coach, team and Tifanie’s school and teachers that no actual tests were given and the diagnosis was an assumption by the doctor.
The coach sent another email to all team members containing information regarding where to obtain the H1N1 vaccination.
The saga continues.
Amazing and ridiculous! And, all because my niece was doing what little girls do…..flirting with a boy.
Posted in Do Unto Others | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 20th, 2009
It’s just not right when 90% of the people I talk to are miserable about something. The “something” is not necessarily financial, but most problems seem to be at least somewhat related. I can remember a time when people were easy going. There was a time when people were nice. There was even a time when people would just smile when they looked at you. I don’t know if it’s South Florida or all over, but “please” and “thank you” seems to be words of the past. How can that be? Can people be that unhappy, that selfish and self absorbed that simple etiquette has become obsolete?
There was a time when I would be standing in line and I let that person behind me with just a few items go ahead of me. You would have thought I gave them a gift by the way they smiled and expressed their appreciation. The other day, I did just that, I let someone go in front of me. They didn’t look at me, didn’t smile and didn’t respond with a thank you. I’m not one that requires appreciation for what I do, but “thank you?” T H A N K Y O U! It’s so easy to say!
What bothers me most is that for a person who is not an angry person, I’m getting angry! I would like to express to people that they are not the only ones that are having a difficult time. I would like to tell them that this economically challenged society is effecting each and every one of us. I want to say, “you’re not helping the situation by being an ass hole,” but of course I don’t.
So what do we do? Do we sit back and hope that our newly formed, non-Democratic government will actually resolve the issues it’s caused. Now that’s a scary thought!
Sometimes, I would stand outside and enjoy the weather; the heat of the sun, the vibrant color of the trees, the sounds of nature. As comforting as that sounds, it’s not as it used to be. It’s almost eerie and there’s an ominous feeling in the air. Oddly enough I often feel as if I’m on another planet. Funny, Mike has often accused me of being an alien because, in his eyes, I’m different than anyone he’s ever met before. Now sometimes I wish I was so I could go home!
The ironic thing is that we have become a society that focuses on health and being healthy and living long healthy lives. Yet, the stress that we’re dealing with is going to kill us. How much attention is being given to the Swine Flu? Is there no one that is realizing that we are facing a much larger “pandemic”? Maybe…..THAT’S the plan! Maybe what “they” are figuring is that if the Swine Flu Vaccination doesn’t infect us all the stress will. Hmm, I wonder!!!
Posted in This is What I Think | 2 Comments »
Thursday, October 15th, 2009
I’m wondering how many people are now facing a new issue when it comes to their jobs. Some of us who are working are at the hands of unreasonable, tyrants who call themselves Bosses. It seems to me that because of the economic climate and the unemployment rate, more and more people I speak to are being mistreated and have no choice but to hang in there because they need a job. Our bosses have us over a barrel and I for one am dealing with a real winner!
I have been employed as an office manager / slave for the last two years. I work in a home office close to home which is why I didn’t make a move sooner. Although, twice before I told her I was quitting and she told me she would change. Stupid me, I gave in. I have done everything from painting and repairing furniture to repairing cabinets and doing other household repairs. I wrap every gift, make and cancel about five doctor’s appointments a week, I fill and drain her pool and load and unload her work vehicles as well as taking out the garbage and cleaning up her messes. Not exactly the responsibilities of an office manager. I am more like a personal assistant at the pay rate of an amusement park attendant, which in itself is basically what I am without the amusement.
Now, I’m a very patient person with an extremely high tolerance for getting stepped on, but this lady is out of hand. She is totally incapable of organizing her time or herself and every moment of her life reflects this. Every day, when I leave work I straighten out my desk. Every morning it takes me a half hour to clean my desk from the mess she made the previous night. This is what I walk in to. 
If she takes a folder out of the file cabinet, she drops it on the floor when she’s done. Every cordless phone goes missing, every pen she touches disappears, every important paper is buried somewhere in the mounds of paper upon her desk.
She has yet to leave the house on time or without the need to have me call her cell phone so that she might locate it. Nine out of ten appointments require a phone call from me to inform the person she’s meeting that’s she’s running usually about an hour late. As she leaves the house she’s barking orders and for the most part as soon as she’s in the car, she’s calling and frantic about all the other things that she forgot to do that I now need to do. She emanates stress and ultimately it’s projected on those anywhere near her. Every day I have vendors asking me how I can stand to work for her and clients calling saying that they don’t want her on the job because she makes them uneasy. Yet, miraculously, she has been in business for seven years.
I work for her full time, 9 – 5 Monday thru Friday. I go above and beyond and frequently surprise her with my skills and my well rounded capabilities. I work with no vacation, no sick days and no medical. In January of this year, Mike and I came close to foreclosing on our home. It took a lot of phone calls and it caused us a lot of stress, but we managed to get back on track. Through it all, I got my job done. Figuring I had been here long enough, a few weeks later I finally asked my boss if we could discuss a few vacation or sick days. Her response, “Why don’t we first discuss how productive you’ve been?” How understanding can you get? I had frequently listened to her whining about her daughter, her boyfriends and all the events of her life and tried to understand. Her thoughtless comment did me in. This women is so “understanding” that when I hurt my back and was in pain for a month she had the nerve to say to me that it was getting annoying to her that my back was bothering me because she needed me to clean up after her.
Just to be fair I should tell you that my boss is not totally without heart. On the Friday before Labor Day weekend, she threw me a bone. She told me that I could leave at 3:00 and that she’d paid me for the day. However, without missing a beat she interjected, “I’m not paying you for Monday, though.” Nice, thank you for your generosity!
To further explain my day to day ventures working for a lunatic I tell you this. Understanding that I keep the books, I write notes, sometimes with dollar amounts. On one occasion there was a sticky note on my desk with a question. “What is this?” The sticky note was one that I threw out two days prior with a check number and amount on it that I needed to research. To make this perfectly clear, my boss goes through my garbage to see what I’m doing. Needless to say, now anything I think she might be curious about, I shred. I’ve talked with the girls that work for her and across the board when you tell her anything she questions and second guesses. After all, she’s the only one that does everything right.
My bosses latest episode with me was over my clothing. As a matter of explanation, I am thin, she’s not. I wear clothes that compliment me, but do not dress like a floozy. I dress as nicely as I need to dress for a home office where I have no interaction with anyone day in and day out. On a recent rant my boss decidedly told me that she wants me to dress differently so as not to cause any undo attention from the landscapers and the workmen around the neighborhood. This panic on her part was due to her distress that someone might think I live there and come back and rape her at night. Now I ask you, how would you respond to that?
As another example of the kind of person that I am tolerating every day, I offer you this. This self serving individual has a very strained relationship with her daughter who has two adorable little girls. My boss continually complains to me that her daughter is insensitive and doesn’t care about her. The other day she told me that she and her daughter were not speaking “again.” The reason; my boss totally forgot that her granddaughter was having surgery and neglected to call or show any interest in her well-being. My boss expressed to me that she is overly stressed and had so many things on her mind and then she asked me if I thought she was justified. I told her in no uncertain terms that there she has no excuse what-so-ever and that she was totally wrong. Without a word, my boss left the room.
Just in case you have any doubts, here are a few more abridged versions of “her” episodes. She left me a voice message that she woke up with a bug bite and that if anything should happen to her she wanted me to know because people die from bug bites. Upon being invited to stop by my house for a birthday party I was throwing, she opened the door and walked into a house down my block with a handful of balloons and insisted to the owners that she was in the right house. She judged this by the similar car in the driveway. She called me at 10:00 at night and left a frantic voice mail that she left her purse in PakMail, which had closed hours ago, and she needed me to come by and open the house for her. I didn’t respond but found out later that she called the police who contacted the owners and they opened the store for her. She sent me an email with all the particulars of her blind date; name, phone, picture, email, etc. just in case. The following day I received another email telling me that we need a code word that she could send me just in case her “blind date” was going to kill her. That way he wouldn’t know that she alerted anyone. I’m pretty sure those examples have given you a clearer picture of my boss!
Well, now I’ve ranted and given examples of what I’m dealing with on a day to day basis. In a normal economic climate I would have been long gone. Mike has problems as well with his boss who recently thought it okay to deduct money from his paycheck for the company items that were stolen out of the company truck. Mike has no recourse, he surely can’t confront his boss and risk losing his job. How many of us are “stuck” under the rule of a boss who is totally taking advantage of the fact that we have nowhere to go. What’s the chance of getting another job? Is making waves worth the risk? Need we all be subjected to abuse at the hands of our boss who now has us “biting the bullet” because we are out of options? How many of us are in the same boat?
Posted in Do Unto Others | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, October 14th, 2009
I was walking through a parking lot recently and an older woman approached me and asked me the location of a store. I told her where it was at which point she took my hand. She said, “Today, I’m going to give you something.” She continued, “I give you peace, warmth and patience. I give you comfort and love for you and your family.”
I thanked her and told her that she was wonderful. She kissed me on the cheek and walked away. She made my day!!!
Posted in One Good Turn | No Comments »
Tuesday, October 6th, 2009
There are many questions that have arisen about the Swine Flu and the H1N1 vaccination. The controversy is astonishing and coming from people in all walks of life. Unfortunately, we don’t know where to turn for the truth. I’ve written an article on GoArticles.com touching on one aspect of concerns. The part that Dynacorp plays in the production of the H1N1 is nothing short of alarming. Voice your opinion by taking part in the poll on www.wapatu.com which poses the question, “Do you believe that the Swine Flu vaccination is in “the people’s” best interest?”
Posted in Do Unto Others | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 5th, 2009
As a continuation of the week we had upon our return to South Florida, I am writing now.
As a habit and as a form of protection against Bank of America and the low lives perpetrating identity theft, the first thing I do when my eyes are open, is to turn on my computer to check our bank balances. To my surprise, one morning I found a $289 charge for golf clubs. We don’t play golf. On numerous occasions, I had woken up to find charges to my account that were mysteriously debited between 3:00 am and 7:00 am, causing one or more overdraft fees. To clarify, yes, sometimes my balance is dangerously close to zero, which in no way justifies the early morning practices of Bank of America. I do find that if I can catch the debit while it’s still pending I stand half a chance of having it reversed with a little less aggravation.
Back to my story. My eyes opened and I turned on my computer, well I thought I turned on my computer. I pushed the button, walked away and came back to a black screen. Even though it did sound like it was running, I did exactly what you’re not supposed to do and held the button until it shut down. I figured it was a glitch which happens sometimes. Why expect a $1500 piece of equipment to work all the time? I pushed the button again totally assuming that this time the screen would light up and I’d be up and running. No such luck! When I pushed the button it would say, “no connection” and then go black for good. I called my dad who fixes other people’s computers and he informed me that without an error message there was little he could help me with, but suggested I change the power supply. Late for work, I intended to pick one up on my way home. In all honesty, my thought process was that my computer just needed time to rest and it would be fine when I got home. With this thinking in mind, I decided against buying the power supply. My intention was to go home, fire up my computer, which by the way contains all my financial records, and then pay a couple bills. I hurried home, pushed the button, nothing!!! I guessed I’d buy a power supply and assumed that would resolve my problem.
Excitedly, I purchased the power supply from Office Max and slowly went through the matrix of wires to install it. I never saw so many connectors attached to nothing, so I maticulously disconnected one of the old and connected one of the new one by one. Then, I sat back, lit a cigarette and took a breath and waited five whole minutes before hitting the button. I pushed the button, took another deep breath, and looked at the black screen. Okay, now panic started to set in. I am very thorough with my finances yet like an idiot backed up everything to my desktop. Why? Because, I didn’t want to take the time to reach to my left and get the disc that my previous save from three months ago was on. Just stupid!
At this point and in desperation, I did what any computer savvy person would do, I turned on my lap top to search the forums for possible solutions. After a while, I found a possible solution and as far as I was concerned any possible solution was worth trying. Replace the video card. I returned the power supply to Office Max and purchased a video card and hurried home. Installation of the video card was really simple. I turned on the computer and my monitor lit up, what a wonderful feeling. I needed now to install the software and as I did it said something wasn’t compatible, but honestly I didn’t care. I continued the installation and everything worked fine. Mind you the first thing I did after that was to take the 1 TB backup I had bought months ago and I backed up everything. That little black box is now one of my most valuable possessions.
In conclusion, if you turn on your computer and it sounds like it’s running, fans and all, and it says “no connection” and then the screen goes black, it very well might be your video card. A $59.99 solution that was well worth it!!
Posted in A Day In My Life | No Comments »
Friday, October 2nd, 2009
I do know that some people have lives that are wrought with misery. I understand that there are many, many people that are suffering everyday. I do not take what I have for granted. I, and those close to me (most of them) are healthy, somewhat happy and keeping there heads above water. When I write about my day to day stress it is a release for me. Everything each one of us faces is relative to what we are used to. Although there seems to be a black cloud lingering over my head right now, I know that because I am married to a wonderful man and happy in love that we’ll get by together. Sometimes it might be by the skin of our teeth, but repeating, “this too shall pass,” is often all I need. I try like hell to live each moment as if it’s my last and if it’s not a good one I am confident that those moments will come. My only wish would be, that those deserving of it, should have happy and fulfilling lives as well.
Posted in A Day In My Life | No Comments »
